Siblings

I remember fighting with my siblings, I would sit on my brother, scream at my sisters, resent my parents for having the girls... but I never understood why it drove my mom crazy.  UNTIL NOW!

I know that siblings fight - and it's how we learn to get along with others.  I wanted that for my kids and for our family, which is why we had a second child.  I read somewhere that a sibling knows you for the longest time in your life.  From young childhood to old age, your sibling is hopefully always there.  I've tried to instill this in my kids.  My mom instilled it in us and my sisters and brother are people I know I can always count on to help, or watch my kids, or get me a deal on a hotel, or build me a gate in my fence.  I hope it goes the other way too. 

But back to my kids.  They got along great, and can get along great on certain days.  Then Jeremy hit about 3&1/2 and decided he didn't want to take orders anymore.  Thats when things hit the fan so to speak.  Suddenly there was this massive power struggle going on in our household.  I needed to be right over Mike, he needed to be right over me, Natalie needed to be right over Jeremy and Jeremy over her, then the kids had to fight us and we started fighting the kids.  It was the opposite of anarchy in that we weren't all doing what we wanted, we were all doing what the others didn't want. 

So, how do we fix it?  I can't change the kids, just wait for them to grow out of it.  I can't change Mike because he just doesn't change when he thinks he isn't wrong.  So I have to change me. The problem is, I'm not sure how...